HOLDING ON TO HER

She was all fair & lovely, beautiful dark eyes and… Everything about her was just so angelic! Well now, when I try to recall her face… I don’t even know if the face I see when I close my eyes is hers or is it simply a face I created in my mind. All I remember about her is may be from what I have written in my blog and of course later, read many, many times. Though now it seems perfectly obvious that it is impossible to remember a face in only in a few momentary glances… but back that night, on that bus, I felt her face will never leave my mind and I will remember her for my life. But then, it didn’t happen.

So now I curse myself for not staring at her a little longer, for not talking to her more than just a few introductory words, for not asking her even her name, leave aside exchanging phone nos. I curse myself for not going on that bus stand the next week or any time again, because I was scared of dealing with her absence.

Now I feel that it was not meant to be just a small unforgettable incident. Don’t know if I feel this because I recently watched the beautiful movie, ‘Serendipity’, or because of the fact that she was the only girl who not only touched my heart but also filled it with her self. She has been a huge reason that since her I have no posts on my blog. I think she has been irreplaceable and I have been invariably comparing all other girls with her whereby they fail to conquer over her and also, or so, over my heart.

I have not written this article to get her or to get to her, though I have to admit that I do wish that something like this happens. I don’t think that it would be impossible to live without her or that I would not find love now onwards. But she surely would make my heart congested. I don’t want to wonder the rest of my life about ‘what would have happened if…’ kind of a thing. I don’t want to regret not holding on to her. Therefore, once in a while I let myself swirl in the convolution of her thoughts and memories. It is like travelling a childhood road after many years and trying to find things that you could recognize and feel them once again as if reliving as the child you once were.

Even though I don’t remember the visuals of the incident very well, I do experience the feelings on that night when I try to recall her. Even now I get the churning in my stomach, the excitement and the possessed feeling when I try to reorganise her face in my mind. I think, cherishing her remnant memories is the immensely satisfying feeling as like admiring an ‘Eiffel Tower’ or a ‘Taj Mahal’.

I think that with the passage of time she would skirt into the distant memories and would dissolve into a pleasant memorabilia. But I don’t want her to be just in my mind consuming a finite number of brain cells. I need her to be in my life, be my life. I never thought I will get so consumed with any person. My blog was just meant to appreciate beauty and not to fall in love with any person. But love happen to me, unknowingly. Its crazy falling in love with somebody you hardly know anything about. But I hope I don’t keep holding on to her so tightly that she feels I have clawed into her. All I want is to get with her or get over with her. Hopefully, after penning down my feelings, I can make some space in my heart for some one as special or nearly as special like the peri, the inamorata of ‘the beauty & the bus’.

After the ‘The beauty & the bus’ post on my blog, I befriended a friend of hers; a guy; really warm and welcoming. Though he refrained from even sharing her name with me, he did let me know that today; the Twelfth of December is her birthday. So I would like her to have this memoir as a birthday gift from an admirer, a lover and a friend named Tanmay.

Some people are meant to be together. Hope both of us find the perfect match.

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The Beauty & The Bus

It all started with a ‘one minute delay’. It was Sunday & I had been to Pune to meet my friends. I was to come home by the local train. But I was late, just to see the last bogie slide away right in front of me. This one minute delay meant that the next local was after 45 minutes & it could well be 15-30 minutes behind schedule. I decided to go by bus. I guess she got onto the bus at Aundh. Those black eyes; searching for a place to sit as I was searching for a place in those eyes for myself; were elucidating a new law of gravity. She sat behind me. She was beautiful. May be the most beautiful girl I have ever seen in any bus. Her lovely & fair face enunciated the beauty of her eyes and so did her ‘kajal’. She was there to be described on this blog right from the first glance that I got from her. I wanted to let her know about my blog and about the fact that she is going to be mentioned on it. So I took out a book from my bag and a page there from. I scribbled in brief about the blog and her. But I couldn’t gather the courage to hand over the page to her. It would have been very weird to give a neatly folded piece of paper which resembled much like a love letter to the most beautiful girl in the bus who was being stared by many people all the time. I started to get that churning feeling in my stomach that I used to feel before the exams in the school days. Nervous, scared, excited, patient; I was all of these, all at the same time. I had only three stops left until my stop finally arrived. She started to tie her scarf around her head. I decided that I would get down at whichever stop she gets down and then hand over the paper to her eluding all the weird glances I would have got otherwise on the bus. Fortunately for me she was to get down at the same stop where I had to. We got down… a deep breath… with the churning still on in my stomach, I went for it… “mam…” I gave her a smaller piece of paper which only had the url of the blog. Told her that whenever I witness anything beautiful in life I mention it on the blog and I want her to check out the blog. I didn’t mention that she would be mentioned on the blog. She was perfectly fine that a stranger approached her, talked to her some of the most unexpected stuff, and gave her a piece of paper bearing the web address of his blog. She assured me that she would surely try and see what it is. All through she wore a pleasantly wonderful smile. I think she believes that the world is really beautiful… as beautiful as her. She gave herself a chance to believe in me and so made me happy and made herself more beautiful even as a person. I hope she sees my blog and this post in particular. And I also hope that I get to see her again… may be the coming Sunday… at the bus stop, I will be waiting for her to glide down from a bus like an Angle descending from Heaven. Beautiful…!

The Soft Chocolate Desire

I had been to the ICAI’s National Diamond Jubilee IT Conference, hosted by ICAI’s Pimpri-Chinchwad Branch at Balewadi. The conference was for two consecutive days. On both these days there was this female (a new friend of mine has this knack of calling a girl or a lady as ‘female’, quite amusing at times)… well this female… I am confused should I describe her as a girl or as a madam. In most probability she is a chartered accountant. But she didn’t look of her age. She was so cute, lovely, curious like a child… don’t know curious about what, but it did make her look even more prettier. Our eyes met quite a few times quietly as if our looks were embracing each other. Her curious eyes were breathtakingly mysterious. Such that you just go on drowning into them trying to analyse what is it? - Curious charm or charming curiosity. Well she was lovely on the first day but not lovely enough to be mentioned here. She was in formal clothing with a green-white stripes shirt. Quite cool but didn’t bring out her beauty well. On the second day she looked so much deep and desirable in the chocolate coloured punjabi that she wore that I was mesmerised and completely engrossed into her. She was there only in the morning and I couldn’t see her for the rest of the day. But in the name of her beauty I gave myself a treat of a huge dairy milk later in the day. And I am so happy that every time for the rest of my life whenever I would be having chocolate I would be reminded of her, her beauty and her curious charm.

The Amazing Mehendi Girl

A few days ago when I had been to the Mariplex Mall, Kalyani Nagar, Pune, I was sitting in MacD, eating my mac aloo tikki and spilling the sauce in the coke-float which was just below. On the table besides me was this small group of four girls, having a good time spilling the sauce from their burgers. One of those girls was wearing this beautiful green top. Now-a-days I am getting fond of green colour, don’t know why. Well, about the girl now. She was a bit… umm... overweight. But her clothing very well seemed to have made her look of some pounds lesser. Going by her face and physical characteristics she might be at least 3-4 years elder to me. And most probably I guess she must be having her marriage soon. Why do I think so? Actually she was having mehendi on her hands. And that is why she is being mentioned over here. I have seen so many hands which have been sketch-boards for mehendi artists. But none of those has been so delightfully beautiful. The mehendi had got the perfect colour and it seemed just even more perfect on her lovingly smooth and glowing hand. She looked so much more feminine wearing the mehendi. I was having the urge to compliment her about it, but couldn’t gather the courage. Actually the thing is, in India, it is very unfortunate, that people don’t usually praise good or beautiful things. And if someone does praise, he get some of the most weird and awkward looks, that too if he is lucky enough not being slapped across his face. While on my way back home on my bike, coincidentally I had this mehendi girl riding by my side for some distance continuously. We were side by side at a signal. Then I decided I would compliment her on the next signal. But it was not to be. The next signal was green and we parted ways there. No matter we didn’t speak a word but the conversation that I had with her mehendi will not fade any time soon. And if she does have her marriage any time soon I wish it to be just as beautiful and vibrant as her mehendi…

Another Leg Of Beauty

I had been to Mariplex Mall, Kalyani Nagar, Pune, a few days ago. You know what’s the best thing about places like Kalyani Nagar, Koregaon Park and their likes? These are like bee-hives; beautiful faces buzzing and hovering around you all the time. What a treat it is, visiting such a place…! On my way to Mariplex Mall I had to stop at a signal. There she was in the rick besides me – a complete ‘O my God!’ beauty. O man what a face she had… n those legs… beautiful…, divinely beautiful. But unfortunately, for both of us, we parted ways at the signal. Later at Mariplex I visited MacD. I was damn lucky to find a place in front of a bunch of dazzlingly beautiful Cinderellas. No doubt their faces were cute and lovely but what really transfixed me were their spellbinding legs. Those smooth, soft, silky, fit and well-toned legs were so killingly fascinating as if they were paradisiacal. It was difficult not staring at them when they were all there to be seen. I got this LEGend experience only because these girls were wearing surprisingly small… what to say… pants. When I first saw the rick girl in her 10-inch long pants, I was awestruck. I even had a thought, that had that piece of beauty crossed the line of decency? Was it a bit too hot to handle? May be it was an invitation to problems like eve teasing and worse like sexual abuse. Later at the mall I saw so many girls in 10-inches and 8-inches that I kinda got used to it. Thoughts of indecency crept away. All that was left were thoughts of the innate, unadulterated beauty. Ah man… I wish I can get into a kick boxing session with these girls some day; or may be rather not. Because girls these days can very well kick some butts, very good and very bad. Hope the LEGacy of beauty continues…

Does Colour Matter?

A few months ago I was at MacD with my friends. We were having a good time chatting and also yelling a bit. It was just as usual that our talks frequently revolved around the girls sitting there at MacD. Then there came this girl. She might have been African or Brazilian may be. I say this because these are the only regions we can think of when we see a Negro - a black face, with quiet a different shape and even more different hairstyle. She was abnormally tall considering that she was the tallest over there. I shared my view with my friends, “Hey guys, she’s good naa?” and instant was the reply, “Abey kaminey teri choice bohot ghatiya hai!” Now this was only because she was black. That way my friends should not love Halle Berry, Naomi, Beyonce or Rihanna or even Bipasha. But they don’t just love these black beauties but they are actually crazy about a few of them.

So what is it? They just don’t care to analyze whether a black is a beauty. They are prejudiced, biased and discriminating when it comes to appreciating a black beauty. And this is the case with many people. That black girl at MacD was having an awesome figure, a cool hairdo, a great sense of fashion, an amazing height which just made her persona even more beautiful, a smooth skin and sparkling eyes. I could praise her beauty as I did because I gave myself a chance to look into her dark shades. So the next time you see a black face don’t ignore it straight away because beauty can glow in any shades. This can be reiterated by the fact that Halle Berry is black and she was named amongst the 50 most beautiful faces for eight times by the People’s Magazine and was among the ‘sexiest women of the century’ list of Playboy(1998).

Katrina – The Beautysutra’s Sweetheart

Talking about Katrina, she is considered to be the most beautiful face of the world by many across the world. A fit figure, a glowing skin, a beautiful smile which makes her photographs look awesome anytime are some of the assets of this beauty queen. But what I like the most about her are her lips. After Angelina Jolie it is Katrina’s lips that make me stare at them with my mouth wide open. If it is being difficult for you to recall how her lips are, then recall the Aamsutra ad instead. That one lucky drop that doesn’t fall into her mouth but instead lands on her lips was not like that for no reason. Even the ad makers knew exactly what the beauty of the beautiful Katrina is. Considering the various faces of Katrina that we have watched right from her Boom’s sexy look to her latest Aamsutra’s killingly sensuous look, she has indeed brought out her beauty in a beautiful way. For me, personally speaking, the Namaste London’s Katrina was the best I have seen so far. The lovely curls to her lush hair compel us to lose ourselves in her beauty. She is the heavenly beauty for me and many others. It’s just very rightly obvious why she has been the most googled lady on the globe in 2008 and the sexiest lady of 2008 according to a UK men’s magazine.

Introduction

My Tryst With Beauty

I always had this thing with beautiful faces… I like them. Every time my breath is filled with a bloom of ladies perfumed air which is so exotic, so rich that I wish I never exhaled. I have been very dedicated in praising and appreciating beauty all through my life. The way I have done that till now is by thinking about every beautiful face and building dream palaces around these fairy faces all day long and all night through. So this is my new way of appreciating beauty… in any of its amazing and mesmerizing forms as is pleased by me. This blog is dedicated to all that beauty is – on the inside and the outside. This blog is for all those who are beautiful and who touched my heart either consciously or otherwise. So if you think you are beautiful and you think that I might have noticed you then you would be surely be described in this beautiful blog and in a very beautiful way. So check out is that you…?